The other night I came across this letter I wrote to myself in the eighth grade. I’ve read through it before, but this time it was different. I realized something about my younger self. She was living with too high of expectations for herself. I still have too high of expectations for myself, but just being aware of that is progress for me.
As I read the words… “good kids always get farther in life, so be good” and “stay out of trouble”, I teared up a little because 13-year-old me truly believed what she was writing. She was afraid to make mistakes because she thought she wasn’t allowed to, but truth is… we are meant to make mistakes. How else are we going to learn and grow??
Give yourself space to make mistakes. You never know what you could be missing out on by trying to be perfect. Dropping out of college for the first time was one of the hardest decisions I’ve ever had to make. I was afraid I was making one of the biggest mistakes of my life.
But let’s think about it this way… if I never dropped out of college for the first time, I never would have transferred to Eastern where I met Azalea and we never would be creating this community together. This moment wouldn’t even exist!! Eighth grade Lindsay would probably be so disappointed to hear that I have dropped out of college twice, but hey I have learned so much about myself this past year that I wouldn’t have it any other way. I have always said, “Everything happens for a reason”.
When it comes to being more environmentally friendly… don’t beat yourself up for not being zero waste. Just being aware of your impact on the planet is something! I am embarrassed at the amount of paper towels I use, but I’m learning to give myself some credit. I may use WAY too many paper towels, but hey I haven’t eaten an animal product in years. I should celebrate that!!
Just start somewhere. I’ve let the fear of not being good enough control me for far too long. This blog post is me starting somewhere. For years, I have put off pursuing my interests out of fear. I was afraid of judgment, and still am. The difference is… I am not letting that fear stop me now.
Don’t let the opinions of others keep you from pursuing whatever sets your soul on fire!! As I write this, I am honestly starting to worry about not having any other ideas for blog posts in the future. I worry that I don’t actually have anything important to share with the sustain abilities community that we are creating in this space. That is fear talking!! Even if my words only resonate with a single person, THEY STILL MATTER. And yours do to!!
It’s just not sustainable to expect yourself to be perfect, especially when we live in an imperfect world. If you want to try something new, just go for it!! Think of what you see as mistakes as actually being opportunities to grow.
- the Lindsay of the Browns
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